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<h1><a href="https://archiveofourown.org/works/27594554">Some Idiots on Tumblr</a> by <a class='authorlink' href='https://archiveofourown.org/users/Ferith12/pseuds/Ferith12'>Ferith12</a></h1>

<table class="full">

<tr><td><b>Series:</b></td><td>Hetalia [45]</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Category:</b></td><td>Hetalia: Axis Powers</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Genre:</b></td><td>Gen, Help, I've never done anything like this before, Social Media, nations revealed</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Language:</b></td><td>English</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Status:</b></td><td>In-Progress</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Published:</b></td><td>2020-11-16</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Updated:</b></td><td>2020-11-17</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Packaged:</b></td><td>2021-05-18 04:20:29</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Rating:</b></td><td>General Audiences</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Warnings:</b></td><td>No Archive Warnings Apply</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Chapters:</b></td><td>4</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Words:</b></td><td>2,414</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Publisher:</b></td><td>archiveofourown.org</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Story URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/works/27594554</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Author URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/users/Ferith12/pseuds/Ferith12</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Summary:</b></td><td><div class="userstuff">
              <p>It was America, unsurprisingly, who let the secret slip.</p>
            </div></td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Series:</b></td><td>Hetalia [45]</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Series URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/series/2306084</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Comments:</b></td><td>17</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Kudos:</b></td><td>69</td></tr>

</table>

<a name="section0001"><h2>1. Chapter 1</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Author's Note:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
      <p>AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA I don't know what I'm doing!!!!!!!!!!</p>
    </blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>
  <span>It was America, unsurprisingly, who let the secret slip.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>It was a little surprising that he let it slip on Tumblr.com.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Prussia, who was the only Nation who spent… an embarrassingly large proportion of his time on Tumblr was the first to see the shitshow happen.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Ah Icharus,” he said in the private discord (it was called the Cool Kids Club, and contained America, Canada, Australia, New Zealand and… Prussia and Liechtenstein for some reason) “You have flown too close to the sun.”</span>
  <span><br/>
</span>
  <span>“FUCK” America replied.  Canada responded with “?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Go check tumblr,” Prussia said.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>The tumblr thing on its own wouldn’t have been too bad, probably, except that there was a (US) government leak at the same time that revealed the existence of Nations and several of their human names and identities.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Nations all over the world scrambled to make some sort of PR response.  Tumblr, of course, went insane with memes.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>America changed his tumblr url to </span>
  <span>@yeahimtheusa</span>
  <span> and tried to ride out the chaos.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>On the Cool Kids Club discord:</span>
</p><p>
  <b>Murica!: <br/>
</b>
  <span>I think it’s one of those things, you know?<br/>
</span>
  <span>like when you drop your wallet in the river<br/>
</span>
  <span>and then you think, Wow that was really stupid<br/>
</span>
  <span>but then later you find out that the stock market crashed<br/>
</span>
  <span>so you’re like, Oh, that’s why and you feel a little less dumb<br/>
</span>
  <span>but also you could really use that twenty bucks you just lost.</span>
</p><p>
  <b>Sugar and Spice and Shotguns:<br/>
</b>
  <span>you still did accidentally reveal your secret to all of tumblr tho<br/>
</span>
  <span>I mean, no one made you do that</span>
</p><p>
  <b>Murica!:<br/>
</b>
  <span>Liechtenstein I thought you were supposed to be the Nice One!</span>
</p><p>
  <b>Sugar and Spice and Shotguns:<br/>
</b>
  <span>No.  That was canada<br/>
</span>
  <span>We voted</span>
</p><p>
  <b>Mr.MapleMan:<br/>
</b>
  <span>bro<br/>
</span>
  <span>i can’t believe you forgot about me…</span>
</p><p>
  <b>Murica!:<br/>
</b>
  <span>IT’S BEEN A STRESSFUL WEEK OKAY</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Prussia, get off the computer, you need to take this seriously!” Germany said.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“No I don’t!” Prussia said gleefully, “I’m dead!  I don’t exist!  I don’t have to do anything but point at the whole thing and laugh.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“</span>
  <em>
    <span>Prussia.”</span>
  </em>
</p><p>
  <span>“Hey, hey,” Prussia said, “It’ll be okay.  You’ll be fine.  Just go down there and do your press conference, and if anyone calls you a nazi bastard or something just come home and, I don’t know, cry on my shoulder for a bit.  You’ll get through this, promise.  You don’t need me for this, just go do your thing and everyone will be so in awe of your awesome professionalism they’ll love you.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Germany smiled a little, “Okay,” he said, “I’ll do my best.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Go make me proud.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Later, Prussia opened up tumblr to find that it was fuller than it’d ever been in his life.  It felt like God was laughing at him.</span>
</p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0002"><h2>2. Chapter 2</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>
  <span>Anon:</span>
</p><p>
  <span>What’s your take on the Nation Personifications?  Especially PGermany?</span>
</p><p>
  <span class="u">
    <span>littleyellowbirdy:</span>
  </span>
</p><p>
  <span>I got a whole bunch of asks about this, I guess because I’m german and you guys all think I’m… knowledgeable?  Or something?  I’m answering this one because it’s one of the most polite.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>So, my steaming hot take on Nation Personifications is that they’re just people, and we should leave them the fuck alone.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Don’t get me wrong, the whole thing is weird as fuck, I mean, a worldwide conspiracy?  Those aren’t supposed to be real.  It’s an exciting thing, and I’m as interested in the next person.  But I think the Nations and their governments have made it pretty clear that Nation Personifications aren’t secretly controlling everything from the shadows, they’re not even active in their government, really.  And I don’t think it’s fair to blame them for everything bad that their countries have ever done.  Literally every country has done terrible things at some point in the past, and if you hold the Personifications accountable for all of it… That’s a lot of blame for one person.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>When it comes PGermany specifically, did you guys watch the press conference?  Because it was really good.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>PGermany talked a lot about how Nation Personifications work, and also his personal experience with nazism.  He was very upfront about his involvement in the nazi party, and what he did during the second World War.  There are two things about this that I want to point out.  First, that he was never very high up in the party or the military.  No ordinary human with his level of influence or rank would have been tried with anything after the war, unless they had personally gone and murdered children or something, which we have no reason to suspect PGermany did.  Secondly, all of this happened a long time ago.  What I mean by that isn’t “Oh, it was a different time, being a nazi used to be fine actually” because obviously it wasn’t, and PGermany should have chosen differently at the time.  What I mean is that people change, Nations change, cultures change.  If you think what he did was unforgivable, that’s perfectly valid, I’m not asking that you become bffs with the guy.  But a lot of people are saying things about how PGermany needs to be punished for his crimes against humanity, or how we should all line up to punch a nazi in the face, and I just don’t think that’s right.  PGermany says that he’s sorry for what he did, and that he’s trying to do better in the future, and I think it’s only fair to give him the benefit of the doubt.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>tl;dr, my take is that Nation Personifications are just people like you are me, and most of them are probably pretty cool.  </span>
</p><p>
  <span>I think PAustria’s a little bitch, though. Idk, he just gives me bitchy vibes.</span>
</p><p>
  <span><span class="u">yeahimtheusa</span>:</span>
  
</p><p>
  <span>I second literally all of this.  </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Except that PAustria isn’t a little bitch.</span>
</p><p>
  <span class="u">
    <span>furgalicious:</span>
  </span>
</p><p>imagine making a post about a current event.  and the current event answers.  Wild.</p><p>
  <span class="u">
    <span>littleyellowbirdy:</span>
  </span>
</p><p>
  <span>I mean, I’ve been mutuals with </span>
  <span>@yeahimtheusa</span>
  <span> since like 2011 so it’s not all that surprising lol</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span class="u">
    <span>thehappytriangle:</span>
  </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Everyone’s talking about Nation Personifications and justice, and I do think that’s a good discussion to have, but maybe not one we’re really qualified to have yet?  We don’t know these people, and we don’t know what exactly their crimes might be, so getting all self-rightous about it on tumblr.com seems kinda… dumb.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Something did occur to me, though, regarding the aftermath of WWII.  I think one Nation Personification </span>
  <em>
    <span>was</span>
  </em>
  <span> punished for the nazi regime: PPrussia.  After the second world war, it was decided that Prussia was a militaristic and radicalizing force in Germany and it was officially dissolved.  If there was a PPrussia at that point, that puts a slightly different spin on the whole thing, the dissolution of Prussia was basically an execution.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Of course, we don’t know how Nation Personifications come into existence, or how they die, so there’s a good chance that PPrussia already no longer existed by the end of WWII, but it’s something to think about anyway.</span>
</p><p>
  <span class="u">
    <span>littleyellowbirdy:</span>
  </span>
</p><p>
  <span class="u">
    <span>@yeahimtheusa</span>
  </span>
  <span> can you confirm?</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Text Message:</span>
</p><p>
  <span>America:</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Dude What the Fuck???</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Can I confirm???</span>
</p><p>
  <span>CaN i cONfirM??????</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Prussia:</span>
</p><p>
  <span>You don’t have to reply if you don’t want to</span>
</p><p>
  <span>It’s just that, you know, I can’t</span>
</p><p>
  <span>What with being dead and all.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>America:</span>
</p><p>
  <span>You could tell people you’re not dead</span>
</p><p>
  <span>You know, so I wouldn’t have to tell the whole world I murdered you</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Prussia:</span>
</p><p>
  <span>AHAHAHAHA no</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Also, you didn’t murder me, you executed me</span>
</p><p>
  <span>America:</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Without a trial</span>
</p><p>
  <span>For crimes you didn’t actually commit</span>
</p><p>
  <span>I hate you so much</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span class="u">
    <span>thehappytriangle:</span>
  </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Everyone’s talking about Nation Personifications and justice, and I do think that’s a good discussion to have, but maybe not one we’re really qualified to have yet?  We don’t know these people, and we don’t know what exactly their crimes might be, so getting all self-rightous about it on tumblr.com seems kinda… dumb.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Something did occur to me, though, regarding the aftermath of WWII.  I think one Nation Personification </span>
  <em>
    <span>was</span>
  </em>
  <span> punished for the nazi regime: PPrussia.  After the second world war, it was decided that Prussia was a militaristic and radicalizing force in Germany and it was formally abolished.  If there was a PPrussia at that point, that puts a slightly different spin on the whole thing, the dissolution of Prussia was basically an execution.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Of course, we don’t know how Nation Personifications come into existence, or how they die, so there’s a good chance that PPrussia already no longer existed by the end of WWII,  but it’s something to think about anyway.</span>
</p><p>
  <span class="u">
    <span>littleyellowbirdy:</span>
  </span>
</p><p>
  <span class="u">
    <span>@yeahimtheusa</span>
  </span>
  <span> can you confirm?</span>
</p><p>
  <span class="u">
    <span>yeahimtheusa</span>
  </span>
</p><p>
  <span>So, uh yeah, that’s basically what happened on a PNation level.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>I mean, the dissolution of Prussia probably would have happened anyway, since we/our governments did want to get rid of Prussia as a symbol, but there was a definite sense from all of us on the allied side, me especially, that this was some kind of justice.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>It turned out later that that sense of blame was entirely misplaced, though.  PPrussia never agreed with the nazi regime, he helped to smuggle jews out of the country and participated in operation Valkeryie.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>tags: #this post was like a fucking slap in the face,  #just minding my own business scrolling tumblr,  #and Boom,  #did you personally kill this guy in 1947?,  #yeah i did,  #thanks for reminding me,  #Nation stuff</span>
</p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0003"><h2>3. Chapter 3</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>
  <span class="u">
    <span>yeahimtheusa</span>
  </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Y’all remember when I was just some idiot posting memes?</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>I miss those days…</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span class="u">
    <span>littleyellowbirdy</span>
  </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Don’t worry.  You’ll always be an idiot to me.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span class="u">
    <span>yeahimtheusa</span>
  </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>...thanks man</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span class="u">
    <span>yeahimtheusa</span>
  </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>I just realized that now that y’all know I’m an unkillable cryptid creature, I can tell the cheeto story!</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Under the cut, because it got loooong.  Warnings for, uh, dismemberment.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Read more</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span class="u">
    <span>littleyellowbirdy</span>
  </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>*sigh* the foibles of youth</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span class="u">
    <span>yeahimtheusa</span>
  </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Dude, I am literally hundreds of years old</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span class="u">
    <span>littleyellowbirdy</span>
  </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>But physically, you are 19.  A Child.</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span class="u">
    <span>yeahimtheusa</span>
  </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>How to become “famous” on tumblr.com:</span>
</p>
<ol>
<li><span> Pray to the Elder Gods</span></li>
<li><span>Steal bones i guess</span></li>
<li><span>Reveal that you are, in fact, the human personification of the United States of America</span></li>
</ol>
<p>
  <span class="u">
    <span>littleyellowbirdy</span>
  </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>I became tumblr famous through the sheer power of my awesomeness, but I can see how that might not work for everyone.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span class="u">
    <span>yeahimtheusa</span>
  </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>i hate you</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span class="u">
    <span>yeahimtheusa</span>
  </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>You know, I’m starting to think the whole PNation terminology was a bad idea.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Online it’s fine, but then I hear an Actual Newscaster call me “Pee America” with his Actual Mouth and my soul just vibrates onto another plane of existence.</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span class="u">
    <span>ohnomybones:</span>
  </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>It’s so weird seeing @yeahimtheusa elsewhere in media when you follow him on tumblr.  It’s like,</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Official News Media PUSA:  A Young Businessman, very serious.  Sorta got military vibes.  You could believe this is a person who personally met George Washington.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Twitter PUSA:  Seems like a cool dude.  You wouldn’t be </span>
  <em>
    <span>too</span>
  </em>
  <span> surprised to learn he knows what memes are. Once admitted to being a trekkie to the surprise of no one.  Still really professional.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Tumblr PUSA:  Unhinged disaster man.  Chief clown of the clown car.  Sometimes he’ll say something and you’re like, huh, that’s some deep shit.  The next minute he’s talking about how he accidentally cut himself in half in an incident involving cheetos.  He’s been on this trash site for years, clowning it up with the rest of us, and then I’m supposed to take him seriously when he’s on CNN smh.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span class="u">
    <span>littleyellowbirdy:</span>
  </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>That’s just the Tumblr</span>
  <span> Experience</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span class="u">
    <span>littleyellowbirdy</span>
  </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Extremely </span>
  <em>
    <span>unfriendly</span>
  </em>
  <span> reminder that PLiechtenstein is a MINOR.  If I see any of you sickos being gross, I will </span>
  <em>
    <span>personally</span>
  </em>
  <span> break into your house and plunder your potatoes.  As a warning.  For serial offenders I’m bringing my zweihander.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>#I know that asking tumblr to not be a disgusting swarm of pedos,  #is like asking water not to be wet,  #but I gotta try,  #it’s for your own good tbh,  #pretty sure PSwitzerland will literally hunt you for sport,  #that guy’s scary</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span class="u">
    <span>moosearepretty</span>
  </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Hey, everyone.  I’m actually PCanada.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span class="u">
    <span>moosearepretty</span>
  </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Turns out if you’re an aesthetic blog with less than a hundred followers and you spill your secret identity you’re…</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Still just an aesthetic blog with less than a hundred followers</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span class="u">
    <span>zukosturtleducks</span>
  </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span class="u">
    <span>@yeahimtheusa</span>
  </span>
  <span> this isn't real, is it?</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>yeahimtheusa</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Let me check, one sec</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Text Message:</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>USA:</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Hey, what’s your name on tumblr?</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Canada:</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>I can’t believe you </span>
  <em>
    <span>forgot</span>
  </em>
</p>
<p>
  <span>You’re one of my followers!</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Yes, moosearepretty is me</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>USA: </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>cool</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span class="u">
    <span>moosearepretty</span>
  </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Hey, everyone.  I’m actually PCanada.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span class="u">
    <span>moosearepretty</span>
  </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Turns out if you’re an aesthetic blog with less than a hundred followers and you spill your secret identity you’re…</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Still just an aesthetic blog with less than a hundred followers</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span class="u">
    <span>zukosturtleducks</span>
  </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span class="u">
    <span>@yeahimtheusa</span>
  </span>
  <span> this isn't real, is it?</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>yeahimtheusa</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Let me check, one sec</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span class="u">
    <span>yeahimtheusa</span>
  </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Yep, this is PCanada</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span class="u">
    <span>littleyellowbirdy</span>
  </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>I can’t believe you didn’t know.  You’re a terrible brother.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span class="u">
    <span>crazycritters</span>
  </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Are we doing a tumblr unmasking?  I’m the personification of Australia</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span class="u">
    <span>moosearepretty</span>
  </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>confirmed</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span class="u">
    <span>longyeye</span>
  </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>大家好！</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>I’m the personification of China, the oldest Nation, but still as they say, Hip With the Kids</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span class="u">
    <span>yeahimtheusa</span>
  </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>I can confirm that this is PChina.  It’s so cool that you’re on tumblr, dude!</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Wait isn’t tumblr illegal in China?</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span class="u">
    <span>longyeye</span>
  </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Why would I follow laws?</span>
</p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0004"><h2>4. Chapter 4</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>
  <span>An AO3 profile that was created the day the Nation News dropped in tumblr:</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Hey, I’m PrussianBlues, you can call me Blue.  I write Nation Personification RPF fanfic.  Because when life gives you weird shit, you make that shit even weirder. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <b>birdy:<br/></b>
  <span>NO ONE TELL FRANCE ABOUT MY AO3 ACCOUNT!</span>
</p><p>
  <b>Murica!:<br/></b>
  <span>Okay, why?</span>
</p><p>
  <b>birdy:<br/></b>
  <span>He read a fanfic I wrote, which had details only we would know<br/></span>
  <span>And he Freaked the Fuck Out<br/></span>
  <span>He thinks there’s some kid out there who’s psychic now<br/></span>
  <span>and writing fic about it for some reason</span>
</p><p>
  <b>Mr.MapleMan:<br/></b>
  <span>That’s hilarious</span>
</p><p>
  <b>Murica!:<br/></b>
  <span>wait, France knows what fanfic is?</span>
</p><p>
  <b>Mr.MapleMan:<br/></b>
  <span>I told him</span>
</p><p>
  <b>birdy:<br/></b>
  <span>Oh, so it’s your fault<br/></span>
  <span>He went through the entire PFrance tag<br/></span>
  <span>Do not look at that tag, children<br/></span>
  <span>It is full of smut<br/></span>
  <span>Protect your innocence!</span>
</p><p>
  <b>Mr.MapleMan:<br/></b>
  <span>I mean, France is my dad so</span>
</p><p>
  <b>birdy:<br/></b>
  <span>HOLY SHIT, DO NOT READ SMUT ABOUT YOUR DAD, CANADA!</span>
</p><p>
  <b>Mr.MapleMan:<br/></b>
  <span>it’s not like I have a whole lot of innocence left<br/></span>
  <span>Wait<br/></span>
  <span>No<br/></span>
  <span>I’m not going to read France smut<br/></span>
  <span>I just meant to say I’ve fucked</span>
</p><p>
  <b>birdy:<br/></b>
  <span>I can’t believe you! Your own </span>
  <em>
    <span>father</span>
  </em>
  <span>!<br/></span>
  <span>and to think, we made you the Nice One<br/></span>
  <span>we should have voted for Liechtenstein</span>
</p><p>
  <b>Sugar and Spice and Shotguns:<br/></b>
  <span>He’s right<br/></span>
  <span>I would never read about my big brother having sex with reader-inserts</span>
</p><p>
  <b>Mr.MapleMan:<br/></b>
  <em></em>
  <span>I never said I wanted to read France porn<br/></span>
  <span>THIS IS BULLYING<br/></span>
  <span>I AM BEING BULLIED RIGHT NOW</span>
</p>
  </div></div>
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